Chris helped me out at school a lot today. He walked me to school and back, cheered me up, and told it was ok even though I knew it wasn't. Socials was my last block and I had it with him. Soon I couldn't help but cry as I was working on my worksheet. I was tired, my eyes were swollen, and my muscles felt soooo weak. As soon as I was dismissed, I quickly walked to my locker so I can talk to Chris again. After Chris walked me home, I was relieved. FINALLY HOME. It's stupid how I wanted to stay away from him, but I was also waiting for him to go online. Suddenly, I received an e-mail. I hoped that it was from him. It was.
November - December 20th
We told each other on Thursday. I could tell she was crying on the other side. I was forty-five minutes late for art class. I ran to the Bus station and hummed through the lesson.
I knew that I wanted to go through school by her side.
Through the month, we confessed that we think of each other when we sleep.
I once asked her if she would leave me, she told me she would never. I wouldn't either.
I finally asked her if she wanted to work together for socials. She nodded and I quickly packed up and headed off to enjoy the moment. She invited me over to her house and we laughed so much together.
Our Anniversary. She told me I was late and I said I love her. She smiled.
She comes up to me smiling. I had 6 A's and she had 7. She was laughing and I wanted to hug her.
All the love songs were beginning to make sense for the first time.
It was Christmas. She Baby Booed my key. I've used it about 70 times now.
She told me she would stay by my side. I wanted to spend Christmas and New Years with her. I drew her a card and she typed smileys and said she loves me.
The winter was colder than ever. We watched snow fall and talked for hours.
She told me about the daredozen. I wanted in and got pummelled. She laughed so hard.
She started calling me. She was the only person I had ever talked on the phone with for more than 15 minutes.
The winter was cold, but it seemed warmer than ever.
She groans about her mom and church and her tutoring. I feel it.
The G folks went to the mall to watch Benjamin Button. I thought I heard her snoring on my shoulder. I wanted it to last forever.
Winter was over. We'd spent about 22 dollars texting each other and countless, countless hours on MSN. I was so excited to see her again and be with her. I had her card and decided to give it to her on thursday, our confession and also the day I gave her her Christmas card.
I arrived at school. She doesn't talk to me. Not one bit.
I walked home through the snow. A voice starts mumbling in my head.
The second day. I see her drive Minmin to Media arts and leaves to escort him to drama. I sat back into my chair.
The third day, I hear her showing Chris her remobilzied mp4 and laughing.
the fourth day, I sneak the card into her locker at lunch. I know she doesn't open it until the end of the day.
The fourth night. She announced to the world on MSN she loves me and thanked me five hundred times. I smiled and said I love her too.
The fifth morning. I arrive at school happily, I see her with the crowd and smile.
She doesn't see me.
The voice tells me to stop pretending because she clearly doesn't like me anymore. I said that wasn't true but can't back it up.
The second week. Chris is sick. There was a space beside her on Thursday. She talked to me and we laughed at the Korean games.
Chris came back on Monday. I fell into depression. Every period she has with me is occupied by someone else. I begin to see how unimportant I was in her life. She never seem to notice me. I began to stop walking with her because I feel so stupid.
I open the bottle with her message. It still said she was going to be by my side. I thought the message had changed to "If all these hints aren't enough, then you should really get your brain checked."
Tuesday Night. I tell her how I feel. She said there was no way she could choose spending time with me over her friends. I suggest that I wasn't the type of person she wanted to make conversations with. She askes me if I wanted to break up. I doubt she was crying. I doubt she would cry for me anymore.
I go to bed at 10:00. I don't say good night to my parents because my voice would be so twisted they won't understand what I was trying to say.
I couldn't sleep and decided to write her a message telling her how sorry I am. I leave for school 20 minutes early and put it in her locker.
On the way home from a meeting, I open her locker. She didn't take it home. I doubt that she read it at all. I was certain she hated me.
Its been 62 days. The happiest period of my life. And its ending. I don't know if I can send this email to her. I don't know if she would read it. I don't know if I can take the result. I love her so much.
We told each other on Thursday. I could tell she was crying on the other side. I was forty-five minutes late for art class. I ran to the Bus station and hummed through the lesson.
I knew that I wanted to go through school by her side.
Through the month, we confessed that we think of each other when we sleep.
I once asked her if she would leave me, she told me she would never. I wouldn't either.
I finally asked her if she wanted to work together for socials. She nodded and I quickly packed up and headed off to enjoy the moment. She invited me over to her house and we laughed so much together.
Our Anniversary. She told me I was late and I said I love her. She smiled.
She comes up to me smiling. I had 6 A's and she had 7. She was laughing and I wanted to hug her.
All the love songs were beginning to make sense for the first time.
It was Christmas. She Baby Booed my key. I've used it about 70 times now.
She told me she would stay by my side. I wanted to spend Christmas and New Years with her. I drew her a card and she typed smileys and said she loves me.
The winter was colder than ever. We watched snow fall and talked for hours.
She told me about the daredozen. I wanted in and got pummelled. She laughed so hard.
She started calling me. She was the only person I had ever talked on the phone with for more than 15 minutes.
The winter was cold, but it seemed warmer than ever.
She groans about her mom and church and her tutoring. I feel it.
The G folks went to the mall to watch Benjamin Button. I thought I heard her snoring on my shoulder. I wanted it to last forever.
Winter was over. We'd spent about 22 dollars texting each other and countless, countless hours on MSN. I was so excited to see her again and be with her. I had her card and decided to give it to her on thursday, our confession and also the day I gave her her Christmas card.
I arrived at school. She doesn't talk to me. Not one bit.
I walked home through the snow. A voice starts mumbling in my head.
The second day. I see her drive Minmin to Media arts and leaves to escort him to drama. I sat back into my chair.
The third day, I hear her showing Chris her remobilzied mp4 and laughing.
the fourth day, I sneak the card into her locker at lunch. I know she doesn't open it until the end of the day.
The fourth night. She announced to the world on MSN she loves me and thanked me five hundred times. I smiled and said I love her too.
The fifth morning. I arrive at school happily, I see her with the crowd and smile.
She doesn't see me.
The voice tells me to stop pretending because she clearly doesn't like me anymore. I said that wasn't true but can't back it up.
The second week. Chris is sick. There was a space beside her on Thursday. She talked to me and we laughed at the Korean games.
Chris came back on Monday. I fell into depression. Every period she has with me is occupied by someone else. I begin to see how unimportant I was in her life. She never seem to notice me. I began to stop walking with her because I feel so stupid.
I open the bottle with her message. It still said she was going to be by my side. I thought the message had changed to "If all these hints aren't enough, then you should really get your brain checked."
Tuesday Night. I tell her how I feel. She said there was no way she could choose spending time with me over her friends. I suggest that I wasn't the type of person she wanted to make conversations with. She askes me if I wanted to break up. I doubt she was crying. I doubt she would cry for me anymore.
I go to bed at 10:00. I don't say good night to my parents because my voice would be so twisted they won't understand what I was trying to say.
I couldn't sleep and decided to write her a message telling her how sorry I am. I leave for school 20 minutes early and put it in her locker.
On the way home from a meeting, I open her locker. She didn't take it home. I doubt that she read it at all. I was certain she hated me.
Its been 62 days. The happiest period of my life. And its ending. I don't know if I can send this email to her. I don't know if she would read it. I don't know if I can take the result. I love her so much.
After reading that, I didn't know how to react. First of all, the note he gave me...I didn't even know he gave me a note. Second, how did he know that I didn't cry? Third, I didn't hate him, and I never will. Although there are problems with that writing above, I was finally able to heal from that knife in my heart. I'm still not as comfortable with him since, this problem just ended, but time heals wounds right? The only worry I have right now is that he feels bad about what he said yesterday so much that he's been saying sorry over 10 times today. I just don't want him to stop telling me how he feels. In my eyes, that's worse than telling me and making me cry. I just hope he actually listens to what I say and still tell me how he feels if he's sad. I love him so much too.
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